Happy Fighter's umm Father's Day

My daughter played in the State tournament this last weekend. It started on Friday morning and we went into a game against a team I thought might beat us. We played really well and beat them. Saturday we played again and won thus staying in the winner’s bracket. We lost that afternoon pushing us into the loser bracket to win back in. Sunday morning we had a team that we should have easily beat and the girls I think decided to not play. They collapsed and we lost ending state in 5th place. That was okay so we made plans to try and enjoy the rest of father’s day.
I made a call to my father and found that he was in the mountains escaping the heat with my mom and sister’s family. We decided to go join them and headed up the canyon. We arrived and took a tram to 8800 feet where we fed the chipmunks and hung out in the shade with a small breeze. It was a nice day to just hang for a while. We decided to head down and my sister thought it would be fun to let the kids ride the bumper boats and go carts that were located nearby.
My sister bought the kids a ride on the bumper boats and they got in their boats for the ride. More people joined and they were released. Along the side of the area was a pay for water gun use for bystanders. I paid my $1 and proceeded to shoot at the kids as they attempted to shoot at me from their boats. Then the real fun began. Some lady with a child in her boat were right below me shooting me from the side. I looked at the water hitting my legs and turned my gun on her. She spun away laughing and as she was leaving I gave her one last shot in the back of the head. (Probably should not have done that but too late now.) The ride ended and everyone was laughing and WET.
Then some guy comes up to me and says I owe his woman an apology. I think OK I am bigger then that so I went to her and said “I am sorry I shot you and got you wet, but you were in a bumper boat shooting at me first.” Okay it was not heartfelt apology but I did it. Everything is done right; they seemed okay as they walked away. NOPE guess not!
They came back out and started yelling I was a f’in pervert in front of their kids for shooting her in the boobs. Her MAN kept coming to me and saying let’s take this outside and he would be waiting for me outside. Then they left again. Then back again and f’ed me with a bunch more words and wanted to fight some more. I just turned my back to them as I stood in line for the go carts. Even another couple in line said I didn’t do anything wrong.
I got in my go cart and the manager came up to me and asked for my side of the story as they are claiming sexual harassment from me and wanting their money back. I told the guy “She shot me first, I did shoot her, and with her sitting in the boat I had 3 choices for a target. One the small child with her, two straight in the face, or three aim at her body which was straight on. I took the body shot as opposed to the face or child. I also know my wife was on the other side taping it if we wanted to review what she caught on tape.” He said sounds fair to me.
We rode the go carts and my parents called the cops in case anything happened outside the park. The manager caught me leaving and took my name and number in case he needed the tape from any charges from this other family. I gave it to him and the cops ran them off and since we were headed home escorted us out of town.
Later we did look at the tape and my wife caught it just as I stated above. She shot me I shot her, and YES I shot her in the back of the head. What a fun way to enjoy Father’s day. Now I have another year to find some way to top it. Any ideas?